Blues Res 0 - Blackburn Res 4

Blackburn’s second goal came via some hairy-arsed defender who headed in a free kick. This was a remarkable effort in that he actually got his head to the ball in front of his elbow, unlike every single aerial challenge with a Blues forward where the aforementioned elbow would arrive a few seconds before its’ owner. Mr Tithead remained delightfully oblivious to these challenges, mainly because he was normally far too far away to actually see what was going on.

Following the sending-off of Painter, Blues had adopted a 3-4-2 formation with Grainger and Upson at the back with young Duane Courtney who coped very well indeed with all the disruption. Grainger was looking remarkably sharp for someone who hadn’t played since 1982 and Upson looked comfortable in the middle of the three. Half-time came with the score at 0-2 and the players trooped off, forming the requisite crocodile behind Mr Tithead.

A couple of minutes into the second half and Blackburn made it 3-0. A very good goal involving a break down the right, a good ball driven across the area and tucked in at the back post by, I think, Johnson.

Following the third goal, Blues abandoned all interest in the game as a competitive effort and instead opted for damage limitation, reverting to four at the back by pulling Darren Carter back from midfield to centre back and making a series of substitutions to give some of the youngsters a run-out. One of the substitutes was midfielder Matthew Birley who hustled and scuttled around the pitch under his mop of red hair looking remarkably like a young Gordon Strachan.

Rovers debutant Martin Andresen made it 4-0 finishing very well after a fine through ball. Shortly afterwards, Upson went off, having successfully negotiated the 60 minutes he’d obviously been promised. He’d tired toward the end of his return but overall had done OK.

Mr Tithead, meanwhile, was having a quiet second half. Having killed the game off after 20 minutes, he seemed happy to ponce around the centre of the pitch and instead of taking the starring role, he allowed his linesman, Mr Slow, to catch the eye of the 300-odd people in the crowd. Now Mr Slow is surely a legend in the making – he seems to be in some kind of parallel universe where his brain and flag arm operate some several weeks after the occurrence for which he is flagging. On a generally boring night for the BlueNoses present, Mr Slow gave us all some welcome entertainment and cause for hilarity.

Overall, despite the scoreline, there were quite a few positives to take from this game. Upson’s on his way back, Grainger looks remarkably good considering what he’s been through and Clapham was absolutely excellent in midfield, showing his class. Carter had a ‘mare but did his best to handle being used in no less than four different positions in the course of the 90 minutes. The youngsters generally struggled and the finishing was, well, feeble. As a spectacle, the game was a complete non-event, thanks to Mr Tithead, but as a work out and a run-around it probably helped the squad quite a lot.

Your humble narrator left a few minutes before the end because he’d parked the Freelymobile in David Sullivan’s parking spot and was a touch concerned about getting out intact!!

Blues: Ian Bennett, Duane Courtney, Martin Grainger, Darren Carter, Matthew Upson, Marcus Painter, Peter Till, Jamie Clapham, Andrew Barrowman, Dean Curtis, Carl Motteram. Subs: Colin Doyle, Asa Hall, Mathew Birley, David Arrowsmith, Paul O'Brien.

Blackburn: Enckelman, Peers, Morgan, Andresen, Fitzgerald, Johansson, Watt, Danns, Johnson, Jansen, Donnelly. Subs: Corvino, Yelldell, Barker, Harkins, Taylor Michael.