Barclays Premiership
Newcastle Utd v Birmingham City
1st January 2005 at 15:00
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Ok so in hindsight it was a bad idea to label Middlesbrough as radioactive and then insert my email address! Ooh my junk mail box hasn’t been so full since I once answered ‘yes’ to the ‘credit card’ question on the girls in school uniform website that I accidentally stumbled across. Sensitive bunch those Smoggies.
Their main bone of contention was the allegation that they are big spenders. The Boro faithful indignantly claimed that, of the recruits in the summer, only the fat Aussie Viduka cost them actual cash. That may be the case but there are loads of new faces who may have arrived without a transfer fee but would certainly be helping shift enough cash out of the Boro bank account. And anyway that is choosing to ignore the wad splashed out on Ehiogu, Southgate, Ravanelli, Maccarone, Juninho etc.
The Boro fan turned up at the Sky studios for Fanzone buoyant with talk of European expeditions, Champions League football to come and how crap Heskey and Morrison are. After allowing him to slaughter our heroes, off air of course, I launched into a scathing and groundless assault on how utterly useless Downing is. Once he had managed to finally get a word in he complained that I was in no position to judge as I had not seen Downing yet this season. ‘And therefore my dear fellow by your own argument you are not in a position to judge Heskey and Morrison!’ The defence rests m’lud.
Then I prayed that Heskey played pretty much as he has all season and ‘So Solid’ Morrison was his rejuvenated self. There was no need to be worried. Emile battered the Boro centre halves and Colin Cooper must have wished he had retired years ago. Morrison hooked home Heskey’s flick on and the big man himself deftly nodded Savage’s cross beyond Schwarzer right on half time to wrap up the points.
All quiet on the Smoggie front. They were poor and are possibly over achieving in fifth spot. Now before any of you Geiger Counters start emailing, allow me to clarify. I hope you win the European Cup, even though your devoted Fanzone commentator could not tell me who you had drawn in the next round! You have the makings of a decent side, a good combination of experience and youth, but you are not quite there yet. Some more tinkering and a replacement for Mendieta and the key to the executive washroom will await.
The trip to Fulham was a potential banana skin for the upwardly mobile Blues. Fulham are like half a dozen other sides in the Premiership, ourselves included, in that you never know which side is going to turn up on any given day.
Again, in the words of Bandaid, ‘there’s no need to be afraid, cos at Christmas time we let in light and we banish shade’! That and Fulham are crap.
The move for the first goal was Brazilian, little lay off, the old give and go and finished with a helping of Heskey’s thumping size ten boot. Beautiful to see, warmed the cockles of my heart, wherever they are.
Our current run of four victories has coincided with the return of Darren Carter (not the departure of Gronkjaer as some cynics have pointed out!). Many moons ago I blamed our lack of success on the reluctance of our midfield to assist the forwards (actually that should be singular for much of the season). Suddenly we have all the midfield joining in with the attack and contributing goals as well. This is the crux of the success. We were never going to win games hoping that Heskey could hold the ball up for the twenty minutes it would take for someone else to help him out. But now we are a different proposition as demonstrated by Carter’s neat finish. At the time of striking the ball home he was the furthest player forward and he reaped the rewards.
The third goal was a super control and volley from the Savage one. The transfer talk is getting dull and boring now but as it is current news I will throw my opinion into the conflict. People are demanding that Robbie makes a statement saying he is not interested in playing for anyone else except Birmingham City. This is not going to happen. If he said ‘I’m a Birmingham player and will never join anyone else’ how stupid will he look if we accept an offer for him? He knows and understands that he is a commodity to be bought and sold as the business people running the game see fit. He has made overtures in the past about going to play for his boyhood team or the one managed by ex Wales boss Hughes.
The best way to end this constant malarkey is for the Blues to issue a statement to the effect that ‘Robbie Savage is for sale at a price of £6 million. Either stump up the cash or sod off. In our opinion the player is capable of transforming your team into survivors and as survival in the Premiership is paramount it comes at a price. The price is £6 million’.
It would cost us that amount to find a quality replacement so therefore it would be suicidal to sell him for less. The transfer of one of your better players to the opposition can only occur if you are not worse off following the transaction, otherwise what is the incentive?
Newcastle away would normally be a home banker. In our current form though and with the winning Birmingham City turning up for matches at the moment it is not so much of a ‘gimmee’. The Toon Army are having a lean time of it at the moment and the natives are revolting, some of them don’t even wear shirts! Graeme Souness has already got big problems and it looks like the removal of Grandad Robson was a tad premature. Once again I won’t bother predicting the result as I am on a roll of four successful non- predictions. That’s four games on the trot I have not been wrong. If this rate of success keeps up I might not have a go on the lottery and see how I get on!
Happy New Year and Keep Right On.